What is the Pre-Departure Lounge? For now, I will liken it to the lounge at the airport where you are sent to wait for your flight. In the case of this story, I will liken it to the ancient souls waiting in semi darkness all day long in holding pens across the planet. They are sent to these places to await the Lord’s call to begin the trek to St. Peter’s gates for admittance.

It is a dreamlike state where you wait and identify that you are in a state of waiting, for the next level of departure. Where does it take place? You wait in your mind of course. Why are you in this state? You want to make some last minute decisions? Not really, you have done all of that in black and white, but this is a place to wait in semi-comfort and analyze all that you are, have been, and are to become.

You sit and wait. No one comes to tell you anything. No one comes to give you the kindness of a wink, a pat, a kindly touch; nothing comes your way but occasionally a small swift breeze circles around to assure you and your blank stare that you are still waiting. Your stare is not blank, don’t they know? You are still there. You are telling them, but they act as if they do not hear. You have been many things to many people in your lifetime. You have created wonders on God’s green and blue earth. You have suffered humanities elations and ills. You really want someone to look into your fading eyes and say hello. How are you today? That would be enough. That would give you confidence to hope for the next passage. You were on the bestseller list with Reader’s Views for 10 days with your silly little New Age Novel. You re-wrote an enchanted gifted program. You had no idea you were doing it by living it, but they give you the credit. No one knows anything about you in this dank hallway as you sit head dropped nearly to your knees and drool on your thighs. Where are you anyway? Again, remember, my friend Xavier said it is the Pre Departure Lounge. He said it is where you sit and wait. Are you taking a delightful flight over the pond to see friends you have made over the years? Not at all, you wait here for the final departure of your living, breathing, thinking, and physical days on this planet. They are all gone, and if not gone, still considered gone. That is enough whining. You’ll go if you were good or if you were bad. Nothing you can do, but imagine yourself elsewhere.

Will you have an after life, you cannot say. No one who has promised to come back and let you know how it is over there, have come. You wait and are left wondering. You have had dreams of what a heavenly place will be and how it will feel. You hope to meet others, especially hoping to meet those who have preceded you.

You hear laughter. It reminds of you of the raucous family parties with children and grandchildren running, hopping, skipping, and jumping. You imagine you hear them squealing and your mind is seeing smiles forever on their faces. They are lodged deeply in the recesses of your memory mind which is still left for you to ponder, or is it? You try and remember the name of the park where four generations of your stock met, exchanged wishes, told lies, shared visions and aspirations, then tarried long after the sun went to the other side of the earth. When it was all said and done, the memory in bits and pieces remain, but where are they now? They could be on the moon for all you know, but what you do know is that here you sit in the Pre-departure lounge saving seats for them.

My Partial Knee Replacement Changed Me Forever!

I had knee replacement surgery recently and am still recovering. You don’t get over it so fast and it is not a piece of cake.  When you walk unaided and the horrible pain that put you in a wheelchair is gone, you are full of tears of gratitude. A friend in London asked if I were going to write about my surgery experience. I nearly bit off his words because I was scared to pieces and too fearful to think about it. Besides who wants the gory details? Not me.  But I did have several experiences worth a mention.

Coming out of anesthesia is a weird trip in itself, but for each of us it is different.  Mine had reduced me to a child calling for my mommy and daddy. I did so want to see them waiting and caring for me.  I wanted them to be there like they always had been. Wanting them was a strong ethereal moment that has not left me.  What did I want to tell them, and what did I want to hear from them?  Did I want them to make it all better?  Did I forget that they are gone, or did I want to bring them back from beyond to tell me how they are doing there? Did I want to be the child, or did I want them to see me now, see that I have accomplished many of my dreams and still looking for more?

The time spent healing and time spent on my own true wavelength is rare time that normally most of us are too busy to ride this wave. As soon as some of the swelling and pain from surgery started to subside, my usual friendly ailments arose and lay side by side with my new frailty. My new wave length became a prominent state of being for a while.  I began to mourn for my youth and who I used to be.  I mourned all of my fears in Technicolor. As I mourned for who I used to be and fit new puzzle pieces of who I am into the old mold, I came to reexamine all that I understand. I became willing to take what I have become and go with it. In a different light, you see the changing hues as a positive addition to the composition and become a little closer to whole.

I could surely go dancing right now, but I think I will wait a little longer to make sure I can fit all the steps into the right synchronization of the timing and be able to adjust the tempo of the overall effect. After all, the knee joints are mandatory for just the right articulations of bowing down and giving thanks for the new ability to navigate the earth on my own.