This morning we carried through with an early appointment to be, (don’t laugh), with Palliative Care. I’m not laughing at my uninformed self anymore, only praising their efforts. The concept is to prolong life by all medically effective means.

I went into the appointment with an agenda. The doctors listened intently to all my aches and pains. After I plead my case, they began to gently bombard me with questions upon questions. They pulled through the muddle and wondered who is this lady was who was so negative. I tried to explain it was ME, realizing that I have been extremely hard on myself.  WHY?  In real life the ME had to change to a more positive person. I’m done but not finished. I’m done looking back and I’m only looking forward. I’m finished with looking backwards.

I’m going to post a few of my writing’s that some of you may have read.

 

HOW TO CHANGE YOUR LUCK:   POSITIVE ALTERING

Listen carefully and alter your thoughts according to each set of situations. Each situation has a set of sights and sounds. Study each before entering. If you are used to entering a certain way, change your entry and your thoughts. Perhaps this will be your simple solution, but I doubt it.

The next step is to address people you are not used to conversing with and in your entry assume humility! You must retain your real self in your hidden pocket and show your humility to whomever you have encountered. They will appreciate not having to tangle in your webs of fears, anxieties, and insecurities. Hide all of that from view and soon without stoking they will slowly but surely be eroded away.

It is what you are feeling that will attract the outside world to you. If the fears are hidden, how can fear find you? If the anxieties are hidden by a smile, how can they grow, and if all that bad luck is hidden in your pocket, how can it use any outward visual pulls to you?

Now for the real test of COURAGE. Try out humility all day today and see where you go. Facing danger, fear, uncertainty, and pain is courage in the raw. It is a new adventure. Take it slowly even adding more choices and willingness as you go. But go, and go in with HUMILITY! That is what I mean by Positive Altering, especially for many of us.

 

TRYING TO CATCH UP WITH MY MIND

I had my mind a few minutes ago, now where did it go?

It went south then east and now I don’t know.

Then I remember standing on tiptoes.

I’m looking for the center from which everything grows.

It must be the purpose in which we search

I lay claim to daily ritual and hopeful research.

Your mind and mine are still a forefront to all of our desires.

My mind lays claim to change,

It makes my world bloom and gathers other minds to inspire.

It is me who ascends or descends with my mind full nearly to the brim with thoughts and prose

Our bodies change our minds and I am forever trying to catch up with my mine. Hold on, let us all bring mindfulness to each other and begin the dancing in the moonlight, bringing thoughts of desire.

Please feel free to comment to us we like to hear what you have to say.

 

 

 

Morning’s With Melissa

episode 6

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IT HAS BEEN HARD TO ORGANIZE OUR THOUGHTS THIS MORNING, AFTER THE HORRIBLE WINDS DAY AND NIGHT, ANNOUNCING ANOTHER DEVASTATING FIRE IN SUNNY SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA.  TORTURE AND STINGING TEARS BRING ME TO THE REALIZATION THAT THE NEWS CAMERAS HAVE FLASHED ON PHOTOS OF PLACES WE HAVE LIVED AND LOVED, NOW ON FIRE TEARING DEEPLY AT THE DEPTH OF BEING. WE ARE LIVING TO SEE PEACE AND SOME SERENITY, SO WE PRAY AND WALK IN THE GARDEN ENJOYING ALL THAT IT PRESENT’S IN IT’S GARDEN MAGIC.

WHEN OUR CHILDREN WERE LIVING WITH US, EACH YEAR WE WOULD HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME CUTTING INTO THE JUICIEST, MOST PLUMP TOMATOES ON OUR TABLE, COLLECTING THE SEEDS TO BE DRIED AND PLANTED IN NEXT YEARS CROP. HOPEFULLY IN THE PHOTO WE CAPTURED THE VARIOUS TOMATOES AVAILABLE.

We wanted to share the pictures of our Tomato Horn Worm. It lives among the bright green leaves of the tomato plant. Caterpillars are harmless to people, and can easily be removed from plants without danger to humans. We are going to continue to add more pictures of our garden walk this morning,WORMY7.JPGWORMY8.JPG

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This little spot is where we love to sit and enjoy when we are in the garden. How did it get here? Who shared this? There is no history, so we will hopefully continue to enjoy. Thank you for coming along.

Please feel free to comment, we like to hear from you.

 

Morning’s With Melissa

Episode 6

YOU HAVE ASKED WHAT A CARE GIVER ACTUALLY DOES, AND IN THE COLLECTING, AND TELLING OF ACTIVITIES, I REALIZE THIS IS THE LONGEST LIST I HAVE EVER COMPILED, AND THERE ARE THINGS WE   HAVE                                               INADVERTENTLY LEFT UNDOCUMENTED.

-WRITES LETTER TO DOCTORS

-MAKES DOCTOR AND DENTAL APPOINTMENTS

-CHECKS A FEW TIMES A DAY THAT ALL IS  OPERATING WELL IN THE HOUSE-

-KNOWS WHAT PILL TO ADMINISTER

-CONTINUES TO MAINTAIN THE ORDER IN THE KITCHEN

-CHECKS THE COMMODE

-CHANGES ON THE TIME OF PILL TAKING WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS.

– MAKES CERTAIN THAT ENOUGH PILLS ARE ORDERED FOR THE DAYS AND WEEKS AHEAD.

-MAKES A MARKET LIST AND SHOPS EARLY TO GET THE BEST SELECTIONS TO REPLENISH WHAT WE NEED EACH WEEK.

-SHE WATCHES THE WATER LEVEL AND KEEPS IN TOUCH WITH THE GARDEN PLANTS AT PROPER INTERVALS

-SHE KEEPS IN TOUCH WITH YOU AND HELPS YOU TO MAINTAIN YOUR LEVELS OF SANITY WHEN YOUR LEVELS OF DISCOMFORT RISE ABOVE WHAT YOU ABLE TO HANDEL.

-WHEN YOU ARE OUT AND ABOUT SHE PROTECTS YOU. AND YOU FEEL SAFE.

-WHEN YOU WERE A KID AND TOOK OFF YOUR CLOTHES TO CHANGE INTO SOMETHING MORE COMFORTABLE, YOUR CAREGIVER,(MOM) YELLED AT YOU TO CLEAN UP YOUR ROOM, AND WHEN YOU YELLED BACK, THINGS GOT OUT OF CONTROL. MELISSA, FOLDS, AND HANGS YOUR CLOTHES, OR PUTS THEM INTO THE LAUNDRY PILE TO BE READIED FOR FUTURE USE.

– MELISSA WAS A REAL LIVE CHEF IN EARLIER YEARS AND SHE HAS NOT LOST TOUCH WITH

SHARING MAGNIFICENT, MOUTH WATERING MEALS AND ENJOYING THE LINGERING TASTES IN YOUR MOUTH FOR HOURS AFTER THE FEAST.

-SHE COMES TO YOUR RESCUE WHEN YOUR LIFE DUTIES HAVE ESCALATED AND CAUSE YOU PAIN AND WORRIES TO ESCALATE. SHE WILL CALL THE HOSTESS OF THE PARTY OR THE EVENT AND DISCUSS THE PARTICULARS WITH THEM. SHE LISTENS TO YOUR CRIES FOR HELP IN MAKING THE BEST DECISIONS. SHE IS STEAD FAST AND CAREFUL WITH YOUR DESIRES.

-I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE WITH YOU THE STORY OF THE STAR GAZER LILIES AND HOW THE PARTY _FAVORS MELISSA INVENTED TURNED THE EVENT TO A TREASURED MEMORY. PLEASE MAKE YOURSELVES ONE OR MORE EVERY TIME YOU GET A STAR GAZER. Melissa made a little flower favor for me and left it on the table to enjoy during dinner. She cut from our bouquet of Star Gazers, one lively flower and dropped it into each Sherry glass of water. Singularly charming! By the end of our evening, every guest seated around the table had their Stargazer Party Favors marking and a lovely evening pursued by all. I have enjoyed looking at and deciding what flower and what size glass to drop my chosen flower into to create the maximum joy to be returned. When beautiful things happen and they will, you will want to share. Take several photos and send them along, noting the names of flowers

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WE HAVE BEEN HAVING A LOVELY EXPERIENCE WITH THE BIRD OF PARADISE FLOWER THAT MELISSA BROUGHT HOME ONE SPECIAL DAY! SHE BRINGS THE LIGHT OF DAY HOME OFTEN AND SHARES THE LEARNING EXPERIENCES WITH THOSE OF US WHO ENJOY THE, NAME AND CHARACTERISTICS, OF OUR NEW INHABITANTS.

THE PHOTO SHARED IS REPRESENTING THE DAYS OF THE BIRDS VISIT WITH US AND EVERY MEAL I SPENT WITH HIM OR HER STARING INTO MY EYES.

SEVERAL EVENINGS AGO, I REALIZED THAT BIRD WAS DRYING UP AND TURNING NEARLY BLACK IN MANY PLACES. THE DRYING UP WAS EXPECTED SO DID NOT DEBILITATE US.

I ASKED FOR HELP. I SAID LAST NIGHT THAT I WANTED TO PAINT THE BIRD, SO WHEN DINNER WAS OVER, MELISSA HAD BEGUN THE TAKING OUT OF PAINTS, WATER COLOR AND OIL, BRUSHES, PAPER, CUPS TIN PAINT TRAYS AND I LOOKED AT HER AMAZED TO SEE THAT SHE THOUGHT I MEANT A PAINTING OF BIRD. WE HAD SOME FUN TALKS, AND SO I BEGAN TO PAINT THE BIRD TRANSFORMING THE DRIED UP CARCASS INTO A BIRD ONCE AGAIN CLIMBING INTO THE CLOUDS.

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LAST BUT NOT LEAST, LET US SHARE THE MAKING OF DRIED FLOWER PETALS MADE IMG_6468.JPGIMG_6212.JPGFROM BOUQUETS OF FLOWERS I RECEIVE ON MY BIRTHDAY LAST MONTH, TURNED OUT TO BE A JOYFUL COLLECTING AND DRYING EXPERIENCE. HAVING THE LOVELY POMEGRANATE BOTTLE MADE A PERFECT RECEPTACLE, IN WHICH TO COLLECT OUR PRIZE PETALS.

 

Please leave us your comments they are inspiring.

 

 

 

 

Morning’s With Melissa

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Episode 5

It feels like a good start to an important day.  Melissa bounces in and is wearing a pendant. I mention it because it is rare that she adorns herself with anything but herself, I asked her to read the message on her necklace. It says: Live to love and Love to live. She knows something about almost everything. She loves to dance and loves to create her surroundings into complete and positive energies.

We begin to delve into and discuss current events as we try to fit them into our day. I ask what she means when she is talking about the Pharmaceutical companies. WE discuss how they have so many new discoveries and would probably save lives and ease so much pain if they would share, but being a business, they adhere to their money making concerns first and foremost. Melissa made an interesting discovery on why she thinks the pills are disturbing my whole being and cause me to be exceedingly high and uncomfortable. She realized that the purpose of the time-released medicine should be reviewed and adjustments made often. I enjoy being high, when too much of certain drugs linger, because it is boosting my thoughts. The crash, coming down, may not worth it. Finally we wrote a scathing note to the doctor nearly begging for help. We became owners of an appointment for 8 weeks later. Another scathing letter was written and so far we still have two weeks to go. But forgive me I am wallowing and pulling dear Melissa through the muddy torture and bending your ears.

I mention to her my belief in the righteousness of vertical affairs. She turns in my direction with a look on her face that says, Tell me. So I begin. We have been taught to be tried and true to all of the special commitments in our lives. I felt captured and ordered to continue learning from sources only allowed only by man made rules. For example, I have understood that when you commit yourself to one and only one man you cannot even be seen talking to another man. Goodness Gracious folks get a grip.

I begin telling Melissa that I believe that my life, my success in being able to think on both sides of the fence, the ability to maintain a feeling of strength and pride in accomplishing health and vigor come from the belief if I am standing, I can share and receive pertinent information from any being on God’s green earth. I have learned and shared STANDING, and now understand why I have such a continuous backache! It is so much more than vertical standing that tires the heart and soul of life itself.

How in the world did I break my back into tiny pieces when all of the vertebrae tumbled down in domino effect?

The people who love me very much wanted me to have a lovely experience with the newest concept in deep penetrating message. I said, “No thank you, but at their insistence, I succumbed. About 5 minutes after the message began a horrible striking pain went through my hips. Nothing had ever or has ever compared. Within several days I was taken by ambulance to the hospital and further on to a rehab.

I hope none of you have experienced some of the bad times written about some Rehabs. One morning a nurse came to get me for a shower. She prefaced my shower invitation with the fact I was her favorite patient. I smiled and backed up charging my presence with a huge hose spouting the biggest rush of flowing water spilling everywhere that I can ever remember seeing. It shot at me smack dab in middle and I will never forget that scene, and those moments of sheer terror and shame. I rooted myself to all that I believe and cherish. I saw through the forest and through the trees. I knew that I would have to be strong to survive. I would have something important to achieve and knew that the spraying water was ultimately going to be a piece of cake!

Are you aware that you can be cemented up again vertebrae by vertebrae, but in reality there is implanted forever, the life long need for repair.

Please write to us and tell us how you feel.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Morning’s With Melissa

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On a very special morning, Melissa, bless her heart, has been spending her time scanning through my computer, where I have been saving many of my, ‘Photo Shopped’, painting’s, stories, some of my heart felt writings. She spent time printing many of the items she liked and began to collate them according to how they fit together. Pretty soon a real book began to take shape. I was stunned, and so pleased, and am now on cloud nine thousand. Imagine having a lovely, creative, helpful, and brilliant caregiver with qualities unbeknownst to both of you!

We spent days and days reading and rereading, grouping and regrouping the pages. We were finally pleased with the results. We scheduled an appointment with a printing company. Within a week we were presented with a lovely book. I was so happy to share it with many of my friend’s and family. What a job!

Some how this morning we got onto the topic of morals and values, the ones you carry with you as you live your life, which still remains a mystery, but a deep study of ourselves ensued. I asked Melissa to touch her heart and feel answers to some questions, morals, and values, she has accumulated over the time spent connected to her world.

Melissa, I want to ask you, what are your values?  We discuss values for a while. She has a big smile on her face and she says, “I get this, and it’s my thing.” Her smile is growing and she is thinking.  We write her responses down and begin to examine each entry.  She states: “I have a good heart.  I want to help people.  Helping people has always one of my main goals.”

‘I value Love plus Respect, the thoughts and ideas of others.’ I read this quote a long time ago, but it is still in my mind.

Melissa softly recites “You should often picture yourself in another persons shoes before you make a judgment.”  She adds, “It is important to me, to cherish the people I love. You need to have integrity.  That means doing what I say I’m going to do, and do it! Feeling pleased with my best effort, my strong foot forward, and my heart in the right place is how I live my life.  I enjoy having a reason to do things, never do things out of pettiness or to hurt others. I believe in treating everyone the way you want to be treated!”

LISTEN FIRST AND YELL LAST!

 

Please feel free to leave us your comments, we love to hear them.

Mornings With Melissa

 

IMG_5944.JPGONE, TWO, THREE, GET READY, GET SET: GO!

One morning Melissa said,” I want you to do more exercise, and I buried my head in a glass of Mira Lax. Both chuckled. Oops here she comes; all is quiet and the room becomes filled with light. Melissa asked Alexa, our mechanism than can answer any and mostly everything you ask, plus plays music upon request. You are never far from your favorite song. One morning I asked Melissa to put on her favorite band, The Grateful Dead. Before I knew it the two of us were dancing like hippies around the kitchen.

Melissa and I had a couple of heart to heart talks. I know there are many things she does for me that I don’t know about. I found out one the other day! Can you believe she peels my Asparagus? I wonder what else I don’t know about?

Why was this morning different from any other morning? I have asked myself this questions a few times and have come to realize that Melissa starts many mornings with watering the plants and being in the garden part of the house. It gives a special glint and a special glow in the eyes of this participant a special glow of knowing the plants and what each one needs. It is like she perks her ears, they perk theirs, and the message is received. Most definitely telepathically, because you know, and I know, soft secret messages are received by humans and their surrounding. Usually it is not our way for humans to think and or ponder these kinds of thoughts. Perhaps we will come back to this subject another time.

While on the subject of gardening, let me tell you about our visit to John’s Nursery in Tarzana California. First of all I would like to thank John for keeping our Community Center grounds beautifully planted and tended. He does this out of his love for his community, and his love for creating beautiful places for everyone one to wander plus lovely soft scenes to see from the road as we drive to our appointed places. Thank you to John!

It has been awhile for both Melissa and for me to have the leisure to walk in the gardens of John’s. I noticed that both of us greeted the experience with big smiles and joyfulness at sharing the ones we would buy to enhance the patio plants that needed to be put at the forefront. Just walking through the garden is an enjoyable experience in itself, but putting on our thinking caps and actually making decisions on choices is quite another. We decided to add color through the leaves of plants and blooming ones as well. We had help from John on our decision- making, and all and all we are very pleased. I learned that Melissa’s Mom Linda, loves gardening. Melissa’s Dad, Lawrin, is an enthusiastic gardener of Cymbidium Orchids. So, between these two gardening and plant lovers, they infused Melissa with their joy and heretofore, she shares with us with her endowments into the beauty of plants and planting.

Please share your comment’s with us. We like to hear them. Thank you.

 

 

 

 

 

Mornings With Melissa

Episode 3:

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Oh I”m in a terrible psychological muddle.  Melissa is sick and the doctor ordered her not to be near anyone or any patient with such a terrible high fever, AND a cough. I have to admit and have fought so hard not be the one who needs the caregiver. But that had side expresses that, one caregiver per person needed, but the proper amount one way or another, is not arguably, one caregiver per person being tended. Now that we have that settled I want you to know that I tried to work hard and do our work, but it is no fun without Melissa.

Having to face the same daily torture, with no loving and sympathetic support is a fearful journey. I feel sympathetic towards her, and hate to fill her with the angst of my plight, but how can I protect her when she is protecting me? Melissa and I are responsible for joining our past lessons, and bringing them to our newly shared journey, which adds meaningfulness.

Melissa has become so important in my life. She keeps me going through the toils and troubles of being so afflicted and constantly are there to sooth a mind full of fear and discomfort. I can’t imagine life without her at this juncture, so I will not imagine anything more than the truth, and the truth is I miss you come back soon.

CUTTING THE TALK ABOUT HIRING A HIT MAN:

I complain a lot about living through these moments of Horror and Fear. Melissa is tired of hearing me say that and said in a strong teacher voice, “So, now that so many things are getting better and you are involved with your writing again, I bet if the hit man came to give you your wish and stood in front of you with a gun, you would not say yes to this plan of y ours, right?

You know she has hit pay dirt and you brace for the turmoil you can or cannot take a part in. Of course, on special days where life rolls along, grinding a melody out the sandy trail ahead, the Hit man will not be summoned today. Not today Melissa, not today.

Please feel free to leave us your comments and thoughts.

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