No Pain, No Go
Do you know that I am afraid to travel? I fear it like the plague, but I still have the terrible itch to go somewhere as often as possible. Weeks before a trip I begin loosing chunks of sleep and think such fearful thoughts. I tell myself I am sorry I made the reservations and I am a fool to risk a tragedy. You say, buy insurance. Well, I do. I over do it because of my fear, but then, I am honest with myself and dispel the insurance myth. It is a necessary thing when you have shelled out so much money, but it cannot stop a terrible thing from happening and it cannot insure that you will get the help and the proper care you need. Getting what you need when you need it is luck. I pray for luck.
Then, I argue with myself that a terrible tragedy can happen right here in my own house, room, bed! I worry about the terrible pain I feel in my ears and the terrible pressure each and every time the plane makes a landing. It is so excruciating that I cry like a baby. Yes, each and every time. I have purchased ear planes, which are supposed to ease the pressure and take decongestants as suggested. I hold my nose and blow and trust me nothing so far has worked. Don’t say chew gum because it is way past that little falsehood. Okay, okay, maybe it helps a little. So you ask, why do you take that kind of agony? I do because many years and many painful bouts ago, I decided either I take the pain or don’t go. I decided to go and know that this pressure and pain is going to happen. I still have hope that I can do something to escape it. I did escape once a long time ago. It will escape it again someday.
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