“A son is a son until he takes a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life.”(This is not necessarily always true.)

11 Dec 2010 9 Comments

by Sheila Clapkin in Family History, Life Events, Reflections

Many of you, after reading my post, “Four Daughters” asked me to write about our son. So, I pondered and I have written this for you.

“A son is a son until he takes a wife,
a daughter is a daughter all of her life.”

Well, what if your son does not take a wife, but takes a husband? Then you have something different.  You have two sons.  Now that’s very special!  One son is a lovely, wonderful blessing. But two sons are double the measure. When my two sons work together on my behalf, I have so much love and admiration for them and will always treasure their interest in being there for me.

My two sons look very much alike; they are the same height, approximately the same weight and the same size in clothes. Even though they are not biologically connected, they look and act almost like twins. I can buy a shirt and they’ll both wear it. I ask one for help and they both come.  I ask for sympathy and they both give it.  I ask for love and I get twice the dose. I ask for an opinion and I get two for the price of one. I ask for a favor and I get it twice as fast. And they always offer to pay for everything. I smile lovingly and proudly, knowing I’ll always receive a positive reception. I ask for one of them to drive and they both say with pleasure.  When they visit, one takes the trash out, the other puts a new bag in the can. They work in tandem; they work as a pair.

The two sons are valuable members in our family. They are loving, supportive and kind. They give each other approval to succeed and sustain the efforts of each other. They are priceless. They are double anything that anyone could wish to have in their lives. – Mother

ANOTHER DEAR GRANDDAUGHTER # 1

01 Dec 2010 2 Comments

by Sheila Clapkin in Family History, Growing Up, Letters, Reflections

Dear Granddaughter #1

At the birthday party you said, “When I was little everyone loved me and then, I grew up.” Well, for your information, everyone still loves you only you won’t let us show you. Really? Really.  Start thinking about the people who love you and count them. Probably, you should just look at your Facebook page. There you will find people who are listening. I hope you are listening and reading. I write to let you know I am thinking of you and I love you. I loved you when you were little and I love you just as much and even more now.

I was and still am a sort of wallflower. Do you know what a wallflower is: well, as I remember it and as it was explained to me when I went to a dance and no one asked me for a dance, I was considered a wallflower. Someone who hugs the wall and hopes someone else will ask them to dance. I was thinking last night that I was a perpetual wallflower and I only remember someone asking me to dance after he had been refused by 6 others. I remember that dance so well. I even got sort of popular over it and people talked about how I was such a good dancer.  I guess that time was part of my 15 minutes of fame. I am still sort of a wallflower.

Here is what the urban dictionary says about wallflowers. And I do like these definitions.

-A type of loner. seemingly shy folks who no one really knows. Actually these are some of the most interesting people if one actually talks to them.

Or

“Someone, usually in high school, who sees everything, knows everything, but does not say a word; they are not loners; they are introverted, meaning they are shy and have a social disease; they cannot handle having someone pay attention to them even though they crave it as much as everyone else; wallflowers are just phased in, and faded into the background.”

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Four Daughters

03 Nov 2010 8 Comments

by Sheila Clapkin in Family Activities, Family History, Reflections

Here they are, four daughters in a row. Can you pick out the twins? I can.  When the twins were babies I could be blindfolded and tell them apart just by their smell. I was very animalistic then about my babies. I still am. Better be careful. I bite.

No, I have not forgotten our wonderful loving son. He comes into view when we brought the twins into the house and he said, “Mom you had a girl and a boy and then you messed it all up.” Now, he cherishes all of the girls and they, him.  But later we will talk son, talk, but for now it is daughter talk.

What is a daughter? Goodness, a daughter is so many things it would fill pages and pages, but let me see if I can condense it for you.  A daughter is a challenging and trying human being that you love no matter what. Sometimes you think you have created a monster and other times an angel.   Daughters do not take all that you have to give, they tend to leave a little more for next time. They give you only so much of what you need from them and keep you waiting to hear more. You want to know how their day went and how they are feeling.  They say the word “fine” and you leave it at that creating a lull in the conversation. Sometimes on the other hand you get way more than you wanted in all ways. Not all daughters are the same; even if they share exact DNA, trust me.

You have heard many quotations about daughters no doubt. For example to quote a few, “A daughter is a gift of love.” “A son is a son until he takes a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life.”

Here is one that is priceless: “Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a Gorilla.” Jim Bishop.  Then, there are ones like:

“ A mother’s treasure is her daughter.”  “ To a father growing old, nothing is dearer than a daughter. “  Oh this is all hogwash; ok not all, but mostly.  Sorry, but I’ll bet each one of you can come up with a saying, a personal quote, closer to home and truer than the words I have quoted above.  So I am waiting. Post your personal quote. Here is mine

“If you have a choice of a son or a daughter, order both.” Or, like my mother told me; “ I wish you a daughter just like yourself.”

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