Our Friend Allegra Died Last Night


My mother and father’s long time friend Allegra, the only one left from their large circle of friends called to say Good Bye. She is 98 years old. She said,” It looks like it is very near the time I will be going and I want to thank you both for taking me out and for being such good friends. Thank you for telling me you love me and I love you. Be patient with your family and keep doing what you are doing. Don’t forget me and think of me once in awhile.”

I can’t say Good Bye to you Allegra, so I will not. I told you to take my love with you and someday I will be there too. I only hope I can be as clear headed and laugh and chuckle my way through the rest of my life with the patience you gave me. It was always a pleasure to see you and share some delights eating, conversations, shopping for unique items and remembrances. We loved walking from restaurants exploring the stores along the way back to the car. One day we had to park across the street from our favorite restaurant. Allegra, as we crossed the street, you on your walker, an ambulance started to squeal and we could not get out of the street fast enough. With our hands waving in the air and our wild struggles to cross the street in time, the ambulance, stopped mid-stream and the driver made a bowing wave to scoot us along and waited for us to get past his lane.

We enjoyed being with Allegra in her later years as much as we did in our younger years. Allegra, Phil, Alan, Dean and Marcia lived kitty-cornered across the street from our house on California Street. My mother, Rose, and her kitty-corner neighbor Allegra had a wonderful relationship. They would do anything for each other. The only interference that I knew about is that they constantly copied each other in some little things hoping the other would not notice. They noticed, even the teeniest, tiniest little copy. That was all part of the fun. Passover is a hard holiday because the preparations and the setting of everything necessary to carry on the ceremony is a huge time consuming task. Allegra and Rose solved that problem. One year Allegra took on preparations for the two families and the next year the Rose took on the two family preparations. One year you worked your tail off and the next you and your family came as guests.

Allegra was thin, beautiful and had an enormous amount of energy and zeal in all of her years. She seemed to be a humming bird, always doing, going, fixing things, talking, achieving, accomplishing, participating, and happy to be everywhere. She was successful in life. She always smiled or laughed her fun to hear chuckle laugh. When you were with Allegra, she focused on you and you were her main topic. She asks her questions continually. She wanted to know all about what was going on in your life. She wanted to know everything you were doing, thinking participating in, and what you were planning, so she learned to be an expert question architect.

Allegra became a widow early in her life when she lost her beloved Phil; everyone misses Phil. He was the genius who knew everything about everything and had all the answers to complexities as well as everyday issues. He was kind and cared about family and friends. Allegra and Phil loved each other very much.

Allegra always went straight ahead and never looked back. Everything to her was good. She never had any complaints and if she did she kept them to herself. She was patient and kind to me. My mother seldom complimented me or said much about some of my hard won accomplishments, so Allegra did. Every time we would meet or talk she would say my mother would be proud of this and that. I thank you kindly dear Allegra, I have begun to believe you. My mother would be happy with me, you are right. Thank you!

Remember, we planned that you would buy my lunch on my birthday and I would buy yours until you were 100. I guess we are on our own now, but I hear lunch made by angels is quite good and you can have all of the fried sand dabs you want.

I cannot say goodbye, but I can say I love you Allegra now and forever.

13 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Pat Rieffanaugh
    Mar 13, 2015 @ 17:29:02

    What a wonderful, loving tribute to your good friend. Your Mother would be proud!!


  2. Dina
    Mar 13, 2015 @ 19:03:01

    Such a lovely tribute.I’m proud of you, dear mother.


  3. Diane Light
    Mar 13, 2015 @ 23:12:33

    So sorry to hear your family friend passed away. But how great for her and her friends she got to say what she wanted to say to them before she left this world. And how lucky for your mom all those years they had together.

    Hope you and your family are all well.




  4. marci
    Mar 15, 2015 @ 17:43:27

    Im so glad you had her. Sorry to see her go. I know she will be missed. I know you wish grandma gave you more in words, but lets remember Lula and Allegra’s kindness and words they always had for you. Sometimes Life gives us things we want in different ways. I’m blessed to have a mother who gives me all the love in the world everyday…


  5. Marsha
    Mar 15, 2015 @ 21:00:16

    What a beautiful tribute to a wonderful, lifelong friend!! I’m so happy for you that you had this amazing relationship!! How lucky you both were!


  6. Diane
    Mar 16, 2015 @ 18:08:37

    Wouldn’t you like to be on that carriage pulled by that horse? When for a little walk and Jim found this right out of our driveway. I don’t think we had birthday parties like that. Talk soon, L. Diane



  7. Carly Marshall
    Mar 19, 2015 @ 07:30:34

    Aww love u grandma!

    Sent from my iPhone



  8. Sheryl
    Mar 22, 2015 @ 18:09:06

    What a wonderful tribute! Allegra sounds like she was a very special person. My thoughts are with you.


  9. Sheila Clapkin
    Mar 30, 2015 @ 13:54:02

    Sheryl, Thank you for reading. Hope people are reading Your Blog: My Aunt The WAC. Do you have a site that I can post?


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