Sheilaclapkin's Blog;

Dear Granddaughter,

I want to tell you something.

I want you to know that my life has been successful and I am proud that I came out of many situations ok.  I want to tell you how I got here.  It was not easy and shh don’t tell anyone, but I used to have a couple of bookshelves full of self-help books which helped to answer many questions I had and helped to pave the way for me to progress with understanding and a calmer nature. Living life helped somewhat, listening to others helped a lot, learning through experiences of mine and of others are good lessons, and especially learning to pay attention helped to make me quite observant.  Sometimes I stare at the person talking or giving a lecture and they seem to talk just to me.  It was that way when I learned to look and stare and it is that way now as I keep staring, listening and learning.

Now in life, I have worked hard, saved my money and spent it too for important things that made me happy and helped our family.  So maybe I sound like I was born a thousand years ago, with all of the stories and all the things I have done to stay afloat mentally and physically, but it has only been 71 years. Not long in the scheme of things, but long enough to have learned a trick or two. I remember I had a boyfriend when I was 16. He was desperate for some $$ to take a bus home to see his mother or something like seeing a mother and a bus ride. Sounded important, right?  Now I realize it was a crock, but he said he would bring the money back on the weekend.  He did not and I never saw him again.  He absconded with my $200.00 and I was horrified that someone would do such a dastardly thing to me. My mother was so mad at me and told me I had learned a lesson.  She said it was a cheap lesson because the next con artists would ask for more and I would know not to trust them. She was so right, because the next person that asked me for money did not get any. I said, “ I don’t have any money.” I lied, but I did not lose any more money to the “money crooks. “I learned to spend just a little money in public. I never let anyone realize that I might have more.  I learned to be very cagey in the public eye and I learned never to do way more than those around me. I am still very careful not to stand out in any way that would put me in jeopardy or draw unkind attention to me.

My parents taught me when I was very young that you do not show off. You do not show off with your clothes, with your money and your buying power; you never order more than others or more lavishly; you basically play the low-key card. This is a good lesson to learn and even more so in this ever changing, ever more dangerous world. You see that I am driving a very low-key car. I inherited it from the person who taught me to paint the low public profile picture.

A neighbor moved from our neighborhood to a very fancy upscale area. She sparkled her diamonds and tooted the horn of her fancy, shiny car. There was light all around her.  Some guys followed her home and when she went into her garage they followed her in. They tied her up and took all of her sparkling jewels and drove off in her fancy car.  She lived to tell about it, thank God, but no one told her about playing the low-key card or painting a low-key picture. Perhaps if she had been listening or learned to be low-key, she would not have sparkled so much. I’ll beet she doesn’t sparkle much anymore and is living a quiet good life. The best revenge, you know is living well.